---Latest Joke You Heard---

[ChiChalok]

This thread is for jokes only pls .. let's have a laugh

[ChiChalok]

Hahaha ,, my friend emailed this to me today ,, its so funny ,, pay attention to the names ahaahh enjoy a good laugh =)

Lee Sum Wan : Hello, can I speak to Annie Wan?
Mr. Saw Lee : Yes, you can speak to me.
Lee Sum Wan : No, I want to speak to Annie Wan!
Mr. Saw Lee : You are talking to someone! Who is this?
Lee Sum Wa : I'm Sum Wan .And I need to talk to Annie Wan! It's urgent.

Mr. Saw Lee : I know you are someone and you want to talk to
anyone!But what's this urgent matter about?
Lee Sum Wan : Well just tell my sister Annie Wan that our brother,
Noe Wan, was involved in an accident. Noe Wan got injured and now Noe
Wan is being sent to the hospital. Right now Avery Wan is on his way to the hospital.
Mr. Saw Lee : Look if no one was injured and no one was sent to the
hospital from the accident that isn't an urgent matter! You may find this
hilarious but I don't have time for this!
Lee Sum Wan : You are so rude! Who are you?
Mr. Saw Lee : I'm Saw Lee.
Lee Sum Wan : You should be sorry. Now give me your name!!

[abdur]

It reminds me of "Learn chinese in 5 minutes".

Learn chinese in 5 minutes
(you MUST read them out loud!!!)

1) That's not right.....................................Sum Ting Wong

2) Are you harboring a fugitive?......................Hu Yu Hai Ding

3) See me ASAP........................................Kum Hia Nao

4) Stupid man...........................................Dum Fuk

5) Small Horse..........................................Tai Ni Po Ni

6) Did you go to the beach?..........................Wai Yu So Tan

7) I bumped into a coffee table......................Ai Bang Mai Fa Kin Ni

8 ) I think you need a face lift........................Chin Tu Fat

9) It's very dark in here.............................Wao So Dim

10) I thought you were on a diet......................Wai Yu Mun Ching

11) This is a tow away zone............................No Pah King

12) Our meeting is scheduled for the next week.....Wai Yu Kun Nao

13) Staying out of sight.................................Lei Ying Lo

14) He's cleaning his automobile.......................Wa Shing Ka

15) Your body odor is offensive........................Yu Stin Ki Pu

[dyaoko]

this joke is translated from persian [persians make fun out of turks and it is none of my bussines... I am not racist]

one day an Iranian Turk is sent to hell, there he becomes tortured..
then he sees that Ahmadi nejad also in hell , is dancing with Jen Lopez ,

the turks says to angels "I want the same kind of torture" that ahmadi nejad is getting ...

then angles tell him , "it is J.Lopez's torture not ahmadi nejads..."

[ChiChalok]

haaaaaaahahahahahaahha

[ChiChalok]

lol, have u had a chinese instructor i have one now and its funny listening to her

:lol:
It reminds me of "Learn chinese in 5 minutes".

Learn chinese in 5 minutes
(you MUST read them out loud!!!)

1) That's not right.....................................Sum Ting Wong

2) Are you harboring a fugitive?......................Hu Yu Hai Ding

3) See me ASAP........................................Kum Hia Nao

4) Stupid man...........................................Dum Fuk

5) Small Horse..........................................Tai Ni Po Ni

6) Did you go to the beach?..........................Wai Yu So Tan

7) I bumped into a coffee table......................Ai Bang Mai Fa Kin Ni

8 ) I think you need a face lift........................Chin Tu Fat

9) It's very dark in here.............................Wao So Dim

10) I thought you were on a diet......................Wai Yu Mun Ching

11) This is a tow away zone............................No Pah King

12) Our meeting is scheduled for the next week.....Wai Yu Kun Nao

13) Staying out of sight.................................Lei Ying Lo

14) He's cleaning his automobile.......................Wa Shing Ka

15) Your body odor is offensive........................Yu Stin Ki Pu

[ChiChalok]

heeheeee this is funny!!!

A young couple got married and left on their honeymoon. When they got back, the bride immediately called her mother. "Well," said her mother, "so how was the honeymoon?"

"Oh, mama," she replied, "the honeymoon was wonderful! So romantic."

Suddenly she burst out crying. "But, mama, as soon as we returned Sam started using the most horrible language.... things I'd never heard before!

I mean, all these awful 4-letter words! You've got to come get me and take me home...PLEASE MAMA, PLEASE!"

"Sarah, Sarah," her mother said, "calm down! Tell me, what could be so awful. WHAT 4-letter words?"

"Please don't make me tell you, mama," wept the daughter, "I'm so embarrassed they're just too awful! COME GET ME, PLEASE!"

"Darling, baby, you must tell me what has you so upset.Tell your mother these horrible 4-letter words!"

Still sobbing, the bride said, "Oh, mama, words like 'dust, wash, iron, cook, ..."

"I'll pick you up in ten minutes," said the mother.

[Egid]

I hear this one at KSVN: Kurdish Students Cummunity in the Netherland.

They asked a man :"Are u familiair with hetrosexuelism?"
He answeres:"No, i do it only at home"

[ChiChalok]

I hear this one at KSVN: Kurdish Students Cummunity in the Netherland.

They asked a man :"Are u familiair with hetrosexuelism?"
He answeres:"No, i do it only at home"

[zering]

HR = HIGH RISK

After 2 years of selfless service, a man realized that he has not been promoted, no transfer, no salary increase no commendation and that the Company is not doing any thing about it. So he decided to walk up to his HR Manager one morning and after exchanging greetings, he told his HR Manager his observation.

The boss looked at him, laughed and asked him to sit down saying; my friend you have not worked here for even one day. The man was surprised to hear this, but the manager went on to explain.
Manager: - How many days are there in a year?
Man: - 365 days and some times 366
Manager: - how many hours make up a day?
Man: - 24 hours
Manager: - How long do you work in a day?
Man: - 8am to 4pm. i.e. 8 hours a day.
Manager: - So, what fraction of the day do you work in hours?
Man: - (He did some arithmetic and said 8/24 hours i.e. 1/3(one third)
Manager: - That is nice of you! What is one-third of 366 days?
Man: - 122 (1/3x366 =3D 122 in days)
Manager: - Do you come to work on weekends?
Man: - No sir
Manager: - How many days are there in a year that are weekends?
Man: - 52 Saturdays and 52 Sundays equals to 104 days
Manager: - Thanks for that. If you remove 104 days from 122 days, how many days do you now have?
Man: - 18 days.
Manager: - OK! I do give you 2 weeks sick leave every year. Now remove that 14 days from the 18 days left. How many days do you have remaining?
Man: - 4 days sir!
Manager: - Do you work on New Year day?
Man: - No sir!
Manager: - Do you come to work on workers day?
Man: - No sir!
Manager: - So how many days are left?
Man: - 2 days sir!
Manager: - Do you come to work on the (National holiday)?
Man: - No sir!
Manager: - So how many days are left?
Man: - 1 day sir!
Manager: - Do you work on Christmas day?
Man: - No sir!
Manager: - So how many days are left?
Man: - None sir!
Manager: - So, what are you claiming?
Man: - I have understood, Sir. I did not realize that I was stealing Company money all these years!

[ChiChalok]

hehe that was funny zering ..

okie, here is one


Husband: You always carry my photo in your handbag to the office. Why?
Wife: When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at your
picture and the problem disappears.

Husband: You see how miraculous and powerful I am for you?

Wife: Yes, I see your picture and say to myself, "What other problem can
there be greater than this one?"

[sorgul]

lol that was funnnny

[zering]

hahahahahahh... that was awesome

[ChiChalok]

The Love Word:
After 6 weeks: I love you, I love you, I love you!
After 6 months: Of course, I love you.
After 6 years: GOD, if I didn't love you, then why do you think I proposed?

Back from Work:
After 6 weeks: Honey, I'm home!
After 6 months: I'm BACK!!
After 6 years: What did your mom cook for us today?

Phone Ringing:
After 6 weeks: Baby, somebody wants you on the phone.
After 6 months: Here, it's for you.
After 6 years: ANSWER THE PHONE!

Cooking:
After 6 weeks: I never knew food could taste so good!
After 6 months: What are we having for dinner tonight?
After 6 years: AGAIN!

New Dress:
After 6 weeks: Wow, you look like an angel in that dress.
After 6 months: You bought a new dress again?
After 6 years: How much did THAT cost me?

TV:
After 6 weeks: Baby, what would you like us to watch tonight?After 6 months: I like this movie.
After 6 years: I'm going to watch ESPN, if you're not in the mood, go to Bed, I can stay up by myself!