are kurdish men faithful?

[pat]

I am interested to know if Kurdish guys are faithful or if they generalyy tend not to be, i know it cannot be generalized but what do u think...i have a kurdish bf, we ve been together for abt 5 months and we have a long distance realtionship. i trust each him just i read somewhere on internet that as kurdish are muslims they tend to have (or can have)more women at the same time that it is a part of their culture and life and they dont see it as a bad thing... is this true? thats why imasking about faithfulness? thanks:)

[Zert]

Kurds generally are not polygamous.

But whether they are faithful depends entirely on the individual. I'd say they probably are more faithful than certain other peoples, but to say that there aren't any cheaters among us, is utopical.

[kani]

well it depends from person to person. You can't judge everyone.
I have met Kurdish boys who are really shy and would not even look in a girls eyes but then there are those "bad boys" who likes to change girls than and now.

[Kurdistano]

I am interested to know if Kurdish guys are faithful or if they generalyy tend not to be, i know it cannot be generalized but what do u think...i have a kurdish bf, we ve been together for abt 5 months and we have a long distance realtionship. i trust each him just i read somewhere on internet that as kurdish are muslims they tend to have (or can have)more women at the same time that it is a part of their culture and life and they dont see it as a bad thing... is this true? thats why imasking about faithfulness? thanks:)

If he is under 40 I doubt that he wants more than one wife. Polygamy for most died with the Parent/Grandparent generation. I have yet to meet a Kurd under 40 with more than one wife.

[Anthea]

If a Kurdish man comes from a conservative family, and most of them do, they will be faithful to their wife

Remember that a Kurdish man's wife will very often be a distant relation

Most Kurdish men never have girlfriends, They have sisters, mothers, aunts and dozens of cousins. Many Kurdish men will never even be a alone with a girl before he is married. Kurdish men tend to socialise with each other, likewise the Kurdish women who all treat each other like sisters.

How they treat English women is NOT always good. Many of the Kurds I know who come from NK (Turkey) have a VERY low opinion of English women

Many of the SK boys go mad when they arrive here and grab every girl in sight. Rather like me if I was locked in a sweet shop. Almost all the single young men I know have lost families and friends so I excuse there behaviour

[Lepzerin]

Not much different from other people, faithfulness isn't something you get intrinsically from your culture. I've met Kurds from "loose" families who were faithful to their wives or girlfriend, and those from "respectable" families cheat on them or hide a child from a previous relationship.

If you could find the exact thing that makes men (or women) faithful to their other, then you'd be a rich person. Honestly that's something you have to find out yourself by actually meeting the person or getting input from other people, not judging them from their physical appearance, religious, ethnicity, what ever.

[Anthea]

If a man loves you he will be faithful, if he is not just kick him out of the door

You wrote that you have a long distance relationship, have you actually met?

If you have met him in another country have you met his family?

I am VERY sorry to have to say this but men marry English woman just to remain or come to England

[Shahain1]

Actually if you aren't kurdish then hes just with you for the S-E-X. Once he gets bored hes going to go back home and marry his cousin.

[Runa]

Kurds are not polig. but you shouldnt get your hopes up when it comes to faithfulness. it is individual, but, yup, passionate guys, won't think twice about - well ok, maybe twice if he is serious about you:)...

good luck, keep us updated!

[SadKurdLover]

My experience has been that no mine is not.
I have been involved with a Kurdish man for about 10 months now. He told me he wanted a serious relationship and he knows I am not into casual sex or flings and have never ever had a one night stand.

He is not religious but knows that I have a strong faith (Christian) and that I didn't want to sleep with him before marriage. I am not a virgin and had 2 other serious relationships before, and I have a young child. The father left me and told me many lies, he is in Turkey and doesn't want to see his child. I did sleep with my Kurdish man, he was very persistent and I found it hard to resist, and I got pregnant. He wasn't happy and didn't want the baby but I don't believe in abortion. I am sure he had other women while with me and has been on a few online dating sites looking for sex, he also hid his facebook from me, he had 3.
He was always talking about marriage and how he likes it that I am a 'good girl' and never had much men (he has had so many women) and that he knows I am a good person and my family are good too.
But he still cheated and didn't treat me nicely.

I told him we were over and we stopped talking and didn't see each other for about 2 months. He has recently come back saying he has made a mistake and wants to know his baby when it is born and that he loves me and wants to be a family. He gave me some money to get baby things and has told his family and friends that he is going to be a father. He has been treating me nicely and has said sorry but I just feel so sad and feel I can't really believe him or trust him although I would love to as I did fall for him. He has no passport here (UK) and he lied about that in the beginning, and my family are worried he only wants the baby to try to stay in this country then he'll go back to Kurdistan and marry a Kurdish girl. He says he doesn't want this, but he's lied so much I don't know what to think.
I have heard lots of stories from other women online that Kurdish men do not treat UK women well at all and that only a very few are genuine or make good husbands. It's depressing.
What do others think?

[Feyli_kord]

My experience has been that no mine is not.
I have been involved with a Kurdish man for about 10 months now. He told me he wanted a serious relationship and he knows I am not into casual sex or flings and have never ever had a one night stand.

He is not religious but knows that I have a strong faith (Christian) and that I didn't want to sleep with him before marriage. I am not a virgin and had 2 other serious relationships before, and I have a young child. The father left me and told me many lies, he is in Turkey and doesn't want to see his child. I did sleep with my Kurdish man, he was very persistent and I found it hard to resist, and I got pregnant. He wasn't happy and didn't want the baby but I don't believe in abortion. I am sure he had other women while with me and has been on a few online dating sites looking for sex, he also hid his facebook from me, he had 3.
He was always talking about marriage and how he likes it that I am a 'good girl' and never had much men (he has had so many women) and that he knows I am a good person and my family are good too.
But he still cheated and didn't treat me nicely.

I told him we were over and we stopped talking and didn't see each other for about 2 months. He has recently come back saying he has made a mistake and wants to know his baby when it is born and that he loves me and wants to be a family. He gave me some money to get baby things and has told his family and friends that he is going to be a father. He has been treating me nicely and has said sorry but I just feel so sad and feel I can't really believe him or trust him although I would love to as I did fall for him. He has no passport here (UK) and he lied about that in the beginning, and my family are worried he only wants the baby to try to stay in this country then he'll go back to Kurdistan and marry a Kurdish girl. He says he doesn't want this, but he's lied so much I don't know what to think.
I have heard lots of stories from other women online that Kurdish men do not treat UK women well at all and that only a very few are genuine or make good husbands. It's depressing.
What do others think?

I'm sorry to hear, lots of FOB(fresh off the boat) young men from the middle-east are irresponsible and stupid. Personally i can only speak for myself, but i'd take responsibility and not lie. Kurds are like any people, some are honest, some are deceptive. You might have just meet a bad and irresponsible kurd. If you were my GF, i'd take care of you.

[Anthea]

I am sure he had other women while with me and has been on a few online dating sites looking for sex, he also hid his facebook from me, he had 3

Sounds like a real S H I T

He was always talking about marriage and how he likes it that I am a 'good girl' and never had much men (he has had so many women) and that he knows I am a good person and my family are good too. But he still cheated and didn't treat me nicely.

A really BIG S H I T

He has recently come back saying he has made a mistake and wants to know his baby when it is born and that he loves me and wants to be a family. He gave me some money to get baby things and has told his family and friends that he is going to be a father. He has been treating me nicely and has said sorry but I just feel so sad and feel I can't really believe him or trust him although I would love to as I did fall for him. He has no passport here (UK) and he lied about that in the beginning, and my family are worried he only wants the baby to try to stay in this country then he'll go back to Kurdistan and marry a Kurdish girl. He says he doesn't want this, but he's lied so much I don't know what to think.

The more I read I have to say that I am NOT exactly warming to this man

I have heard lots of stories from other women online that Kurdish men do not treat UK women well at all and that only a very few are genuine or make good husbands. It's depressing

NEVER believe what other people say - they might just be saying it because they have had problems themselves - Feyli_kord is right - there are some very honest and sincere Kurdish men - just not very many in the UK - but they do exist - however everything you have written about this man tells us he is most definitely not the honest and sincere type

Remember that actions speak louder than words - why is he back - perhaps he has discovered that under UK law by having a child he has a family - this gives him grounds to remain in UK

You stated he is Kurdish - is he actually from Kurdistan or some other country - most Kurds coming here from Kurdistan are already married - so unless he is very young or extremely ugly - he might already be married

[SadKurdLover]

Thanks for all your replies and insights and kind words.
Just to respond, he is in his thirties and is from Turkey but said his family are Iraqi originally. He says he has been away from home for 13 years and has never been back due to claiming asylum. He says he has no wife due to leaving the country so early on and says he's not interested in marrying a cousin. I did originally suspect this and know it's still possible he could have one tucked away.
Yes I do wonder why he is back and immigration reasons are a strong possibility I know as he can try to stay here via Article 8 of Human rights act if he can prove he has a family life. It's horrible to think that someone could be using you and that you're not loved or wanted in your own right - that's never happened to me before and I will try to find out more, not just swallowing what he says. Noone deserves that treatment, regardless what their culture or faith is.

[Anthea]

I have a lot of Kurdish friends - many from Turkey - but the families are my friends - the ladies are my sisters/daughters

Do you have Kurdish female friends?

Has your boyfriend taken you to any Kurdish parties?

[Feyli_kord]

NEVER believe what other people say - they might just be saying it because they have had problems themselves - Feyli_kord is right - there are some very honest and sincere Kurdish men - just not very many in the UK - but they do exist - however everything you have written about this man tells us he is most definitely not the honest and sincere type

Remember that actions speak louder than words - why is he back - perhaps he has discovered that under UK law by having a child he has a family - this gives him grounds to remain in UK

You stated he is Kurdish - is he actually from Kurdistan or some other country - most Kurds coming here from Kurdistan are already married - so unless he is very young or extremely ugly - he might already be married

That's not what i said, stop being blatantly racist. I said that kurds aren't any different from other people. Some are dishonest some are honest. She meet one kurd who is irresponsible, young and selfish. That does not mean the majority of kurds in Uk are dishonest. This board has lots of kurds in it. Now I said i accepted that this is an international board, but you're going too far by accusing all kurds in the Uk of being dishonest. Would you enjoy it if someone made gross generalizations and racist assumptions on english people? Hardly. So stop with these nonsensical bigoted views. There is a difference between being critical and being racist, you've crossed the boundary there. If you want to say racist things about kurdish community in UK, go to a nationalist turkish board instead. You don't get to be racist, just because you have kurdish friends.